<![CDATA[arymami - POEMS]]>Wed, 12 Dec 2018 06:37:30 -0800Weebly<![CDATA[merindumu]]>Mon, 09 Jan 2017 04:01:45 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/merindumuAku merindumu seperti ombak yang lapar melahap pasir putih di pantai
Aku merindumu seperti waktu yg tak mampu berhenti
Aku merindumu sejak sentuhan pertama di lantai diskotik 
Aku merindumu hingga kini
Aku merindumu dg segenap mimpi yg terlipat rapi di sudut hati 
Aku masih merindumu dg setumpuk mimpi yg dipaksa mati
Aku merindumu dg cemburu dan amarah
Bahkan tanpa delusi yg pergi tanpa permisi
Aku merindumu
Sleepless.20170103
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<![CDATA[harap]]>Sat, 15 Oct 2016 03:19:46 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/harapaku berharap tak pernah mengenal cinta,
gar aku tak tahu bahwa siksanya tak sebanding dengan ekstasenya..
aku berharap tak pernah tahu rasanya hidup,
agar aku tak perlu merasa mati pada tiap hembusan nafasku..
aku berharap tak pernah percaya,
agar aku tak sadar kemanusiaan tak ada..
aku berharap aku tak pernah berani,
agar aku tak perlu melangkah sendiri..
aku berharap aku tak disini,
agar ku tak pernah tahu bahwa aku tiada..
aku berharap ada yang namanya Tuhan,
agar tak perlu kusaksikan hampa di lantunan mantra.. 

tapi aku  tahu, harapan tak pernah nyata.


​Yogyakarta, 20161015


arsip dari: http://fiksiana.kompasiana.com/arymami/harap_58019d09117b61720dbc3cdd]]>
<![CDATA[hilang tanpa kata]]>Mon, 03 Oct 2016 07:00:00 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/hilang-tanpa-kataMasih terasa demikian dekat,
Kala senyum menghantar lelap,
Kala genderang rindu masih tereja,
Kala percakapan masih menjadi ekstase melampaui dunia maya,
Kala malam masih menyimpan lipatan mimpi atas esok yang dinanti,
Kala sentuhan dan panggut bibir mengganti dahaga,
Kala hati masih percaya untuk di jaga.
Kala panggilan cinta masih berserat asa.
Kala bersama terasa nyata.

Rindu terasa demikian pekat,
Pada malam dingin yang tak mampu bertemu lelap,
Mengais hangat pada tumpukan kenangan,
Diantara lipatan mimpi patah yang mengejek di sudut ruangan,
Ingin kupanggil cinta berserat asa
Tapi mungkin ia telah beranjak pada dunia yang berbeda -
seiring rasa sayangnya pada hatiku yang lenyap ..
rona jingga tak lagi hidup dalam relungnya.

Sebenarnya aku tahu, meski hati tak ingin tahu. Terlepas dari 'percaya' yang berlahan runtuh kala rasa tak lagi tereja dan ia masih saja mendua.  Entah berpenggangan pada sisa-sisa rasa yang mana.  Ia telah memilih tuk tak menjaga rasa.  Membalutnya dengan tuntutan mengada. Di tengah gamblang manifestasi waktu yg tak dibuat, kabar dan cerita yang tak terdengar, nirketerlibatan atas nama individuasi yang megah, lumatan rindu yang tak pernah tercipta, dan apapun rangkai rasionalisasi diatas rasa. Sayang atas hati dan perasaan telah hilang, secepat pukulan yang bertubi di tengah malam.

Masih terasa demikian dekat,
jingga yang hanyut dalam ekstase hidup yang tak cukup, meski realita menutur lugas "pergi menikahlah dengan dia" sekedar menegaskan cinta tak lagi menyala
Meski masih kudengar 'cinta' walau tak lagi berserat asa




sleepless-denganrinduygtaklagisatu-20161003


arsip dari : http://fiksiana.kompasiana.com/arymami/hilang-tanpa-kata_57f20c3d337a61bb0a982c23]]>
<![CDATA[Silenced Alone]]>Wed, 10 Aug 2016 04:35:08 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/silenced-alone
when we’ve never been in the steps of the “minority” - we could never understand
when we’ve never been the “other” - we would never hear
when we’ve never been the “insignificant”- we w
ould never feel the pain
In the voiceless night she stood,
with each broken glass shredded within her chest,
weary tears and dying breath
for every doing she’s done right, does her wrong
for every shelter she’d seek, cast her off
for every love she believed, left her mocked
for every hand she reached out, threw her off
In the stillness of night she stood.
as the cold creeps slowly within her form
what she’d give to hurl up in someone’s arms
but a hug is too much a wish for a silenced soul.
 
 
Yogyakarta.just-the-other.160810
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<![CDATA[Merci´╗┐]]>Sat, 09 Apr 2016 06:00:32 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/merciKun Fayakun

aku memanggilmu semesta
dengan semua cara yang kubisa
ijinkanku miliki malam tanpa airmata
lantang kalahku.. kumohon... kupinta... 
cukupkan semua tanda yang menyandera jiwa
aku tak mampu lebih lama berpura, 
di lantai dansa keelokan neraka.


segenapku bersimpuh dikaki kasihmu semesta
ijinkanku bersandar dalam lelap
lantang lelahku.. kumohon... kupinta...
cukupkan ajaranmu atas ada yang tiada
aku tak sanggup mati tanpa nyawa
di panggung semu dunia fana
segenapku mengais ampunmu semesta 
tanpa doa.. tanpa mantra.. tanpa jiwa.. 
ini aku tanpa apa-apa

ijinkanku lupa gemuruh siksa berbalut cinta
ijinkanku tak merasa luka
dan .. ijinkanku menarik kembali pinta
matiku dalam hidupmu 
hidupku dalam matimu

Kun Fayakun




Pangkalanbun.saatmalammemintaairmata.080416]]>
<![CDATA[Saat doa tak melantun Mantra..]]>Wed, 16 Mar 2016 01:34:21 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/saat-doa-tak-melantun-mantraBagaimana lagi aku mampu berdiri tegak dijalanmu 
Saat semua cinta merajut mimpi patah
Saat batih enggan bertalian darah
Saat hati harus menyakiti sahabat dalam resah
Saat peran terhimpit realita latah melangkah
Saat semua kartu terpapar kalah

Bagaimana lagi aku harus bersimpuh di bawah altarmu
Saat segenap rasa tak mampu mengeja pinta
Saat semua airmata tak sanggup mengujar kata
Saat seutuh raga tlah kehabisan tenaga
Saat seluruh jiwa tak sanggup menghembus asa
Saat ada telah tumpas tanpa makna
Masihkah Kau disana?
Atau seperti yang fana, kau illusi juga.


Yogyakarta.saatlelahtakmengenallelap.110316]]>
<![CDATA[To Choose to Forget]]>Sat, 30 Jan 2016 06:03:34 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/to-choose-to-forgetWhy we came to text
You choose to forget 

came with history, of once we called 45-45-10
when I couldn’t barge your privacy with a call 
when time, space, and morality built up walls
when nothing real could be grasp
discourse and conversation is all we had.. and still only has,,
And now we’re fighting over words that should have not been said.
Asking motives why we had to text. 
Blustering reasons far from truth
when we once knew it was the only means
to be connected fulfilled the lightness of being

Connection our being, communication our form
Did you forget darling? Or You choose to forget 

How love became a matter of count
You choose to forget

Irrationality craved its form of objectivity
Objectivity you demand to exist, we came to adhere
As reluctant as we may be
we started with rating which partners came best. 
and stoped at 8, 9, and utopic 10. 
And then a week that came with 7 days
We had to divide, dismiss, and define
we craved with desire darling..
whilst questions and facts clashed and arose 
numbers were learnt to deduct the truth
And now we’re fighting why the objectivity?
Wondering if love became a matter of quantity?

a history of numbers of what define ‘we’
Did you forget darling? Or You choose to forget 

A dream, a promise, a becoming
Of which will you choose to forget?

I’m bursting with the rush to disappear 
For love salvation crumbling away I could not bare
Tanggled I’m in, strapped beyond my being 
Hence even if the slightest promise of us had became one blinded vanity 
Darling... I plead for it’s recall
For love deep crunched the soul, I forgot how to forget.
In love I still believe, wether forget was ever a choice at all. 
Did you forget darling? Or .. 

 


Belakangteras.tremblingheart.28012016
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<![CDATA[Pictures on the wall]]>Thu, 22 Aug 2013 01:40:50 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/pictures-on-the-wall
You know.. When words seem to loose power, things just comes to visualize..
And you know what it's like..?
​It's like a framed picture on the wall
That you found so beautiful, and loved every bit of it all
You heed it, cared for it, you cherish it,
It's that beautiful, you start to believe in it
Then.. At a certain point, it's like an optical illusion
What you hang on the walls seems to be playing tricks
You watched at a certain distance and space
It's like those 3D stereograms that always changes
Back and forth, back and forth
And you doubt what you see
Flipping images just get you dizzy
Too overwhelmed, too confused, too dazzled
You want to put it down to observe a little bit more
But it weigh just too much for your hands to endure
And it breaks, scattered to pieces as it falls
And you look at the wall.. It has a big square stain
A perfect size to the frame.
And you look back at your beloved picture, that's no more
It's in pieces all scattered through the floor
Stunned you look back at your wall
And you remembered, what you believed could not be wrong
It is the same picture, the beautiful one once on the wall.
Not wanting to accept what believed is false
You take the frame back up with no picture at all
Sadden and confused you rushed to the ground
To pick up the scattered glasses and images torn.

And you try to put them together
But the pieces were to small to gather
In desperation you relentlessly work
Then found the floor and hands filled with blood.
All the small parts of glass has left small cuts
Too small to be noticed, but as many, they were not.
It may have just pinched, but tens to hundreds it sored
It stung, it ached, it twinge, it throbs excruciating pain
And you bled to stop, feeble, powerless, un-aid.
Sufficated you motionlessly sat, impede, in halt, in paused,-still
And you look back at your wall
And found what was one stain was not one at all
There was once a frame on the left, right, above, below
Now it's all stained squares in yellow.
Some still hung a frame an image with out
And some picture and frame has left ashes on the floor.


Astound you grasp all the broken pieces of glass you can carry
The glass and images that you just tried to mold
And embraced it tight,
As you bled
And drained.. In red.


Yogyakarta.when what you believe may be false.20082013.
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<![CDATA[Lepas Jam 12 Malam]]>Sat, 21 Jan 2012 07:14:50 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/lepas-jam-12-malam​Beberapa cangkir kopi sempurna
Memaksa mata terbuka
Meski tubuh dan otak tak mampu lagi bekerja
Lepas jam dua belas

Mencumbu bayang kalbu diranjangmu
Terlelap terlepas siksa rindu
Kembali aku cemburu pada waktu
Lepas jam dua belas

Denting mimpi bergegas
Bulir biru meranggas
Rentang kala tak berbatas
Lepas jam dua belas



Yogyakarta.Adakah mimpi disitu? Menghias tidurmu?.20012012]]>
<![CDATA[gema jingga]]>Wed, 02 Mar 2011 02:26:25 GMThttp://arymami.com/poems/gema-jinggatumpah rindu. taut cinta. tetes airmata.
bayang gores cerita. masihkah ada, menggema?
atau tiap bayang diri telah kau hapus dengan tubuhnya?

percakapan dialektika. amarah. derai tawa. desis botol, terbuka.
semayam kata. alunan suara. masihkah ada, menggema?
atau tiap cerita telah kau hapus dengan desahnya?

getar dada. bahasa jiwa. lebur makna, tatap mata. hening rasa.
mimpi dunia. Dansa semesta. saput surga. masihkah ada, menggema? 
atau tiap semanyam asa tlah kau hapus dengan hadirnya?

tanya ada tiada. tanpa daya. pahat. pualam. padat tanpa rongga.
bilik dada. yang ada. tak ada. mega-mega dinding jingga, luruh didalamnya.
terhapus tiada jiwa, sudikah kau hapus milikku juga? 




zizekcorner.penutupbulancinta.01march2011]]>